the only man that will ever love me back.

wanna hear a funny story ?

he’s fine with just hanging out. he’s looking forward to developing feelings. so basically i’m a space filler. a time consumer. something to pass the in between. then i’m gonna want more and get bored. he’s gonna get bored. we’re not gonna go anywhere. we’re just gonna be stuck. until i finally get tired of dealing with it. and i stop talking to him. time wasted. then a month or two later, he’s gonna get a girlfriend and they’re gonna be happy forever. 

the sad part is, i could have been someone’s girlfriend already. but i don’t wanna be anyone’s girlfriend. i just want to be with him. but doesn’t it always work that way? the guy that you want to be with doesn’t want to be with you. but the guys you don’t want, want you. i tell you life has a fucked up sense of humor.

i hate when i feel empty and have bad days. i cook or bake, and i don’t have an appetite. so it never gets eaten. and i never eat them, because i remember how i felt when i made the stupid things. gimme a shot. gimme a blunt. i just wanna go to sleep